Steven Pinker's provocative screed
against "conservative bioethics" has got me thinking, though perhaps
not in a very serious way. (hat tip to our own Professor Rappaport.)
Pinker damagingly quotes Leon Kass on one affront to human dignity:
Worst of all [Kass writes] from this point of view are those more uncivilized forms
of eating, like licking an ice cream cone--a catlike activity that has
been made acceptable in informal America but that still offends those
who know eating in public is offensive. ... Eating on the street--even
when undertaken, say, because one is between appointments and has no
other time to eat--displays [a] lack of self-control: It beckons
enslavement to the belly. ... Lacking utensils for cutting and lifting
to mouth, he will often be seen using his teeth for tearing off
chewable portions, just like any animal. ... This doglike feeding, if
one must engage in it, ought to be kept from public view, where, even
if we feel no shame, others are compelled to witness our shameful behavior.
Some
people are really weird about eating. One of my best friends at Oxford
would have sex with anything that moved, but would not endure my
descriptions of escargot in a butter and garlic sauce, which he
regarded as obscene. Not the snails either, but all that butter.
Don't ask me. Melted butter may be indulgent, but it's a lot less icky
in my view than sex with the usual representative of the minor nobility.
But that is not my point. My point rather is that as long as we are
listing things that are inconsistent with human dignity, let us get a
few other more important affronts than ice cream cone licking on the
list. I intend to be candid here, so I advise the easily offended to
stop reading and go back to your linguine in clam sauce (another
offender) right now.
So then, to begin, Jack Nicholson
running around without his shirt on is inconsistent with human dignity,
as is showing one's manboobs generally. An ethical system that gives
us some sort of argument to prohibit this sort of thing has something
to be said for it, and this has to be weighed against Pinker's
criticisms. Indeed, rare are the occasions when men should go around
without their shirts on. If a man is buff, he is showing off, and if
he isn't, he is affronting human dignity. Just by going to a place
such as St. Bart's, you are taking risks with human dignity. Many
years ago, when as an associate at a big law firm I thought I was
making a lot of money, LWJ and I went to St. Bart's, a French island in
the Caribbean where French people and some deluded Americans indulge
in nude bathing. There were affronts to human dignity everywhere one
turned practically. For example, old and presumably rich French men
with their young and beautiful girlfriends, both on the beach, and both
as naked as the considerably separate days on which they were born, and
one of them affronting human dignity for all he was worth, which I hope
for her sake was a lot. The wine there is really good though.
Many tattoos are affronts to human dignity.
I consider the goatee
very often an affront to human dignity, especially if combined with a
pickup truck. If you drive a pickup, please do not sport a goatee.
Tattoos, goatees and pickup trucks together are a dangerous combination
and almost certainly immoral.
Yammering vacantly on your cellphone within the hearing of others or
while driving is an affront to human dignity. Locutions such as "I saw
her at the mall and she was like so totally cute" are an affront to human dignity, especially if spoken on a cell phone.
I don't see what the big deal is with cats. Cats have feline
dignity. I think the way they eat is fine. Kass needs to rethink his
position on how cats eat.
Nearly everything gangsta is an affront to human dignity. Recently
my teenage boys and I ate at an In N Out burger in a poorer section of
San Diego. Some young gentlemen seated next to us were affecting a
gangsta style of dress and conversation. I asked my sons "So would you
say those guys are 'gansta'?" "Don't say that!" they hissed at me.
"What, 'gansta'?" I said. More wincing and hissing. "Yes, that!" I
was having so much fun I could barely stand it. If you want to see a
real gansta and get some really good food, check out Pete's BBQ on
Sports Arena. People of every sort eat there because the food is so
good. Do not make fun of the ganstas at Pete Phil's BBQ, or you may find
your human dignity being affronted. Gangstas have human dignity and
you want to make sure you respect it. And their ho's too.
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